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Friday, July 3, 2009

You won't have Sarah Palin to kick around anymore, you betcha

The title of this post is misleading, a cheap joke. Of course we'll have Sarah Palin to kick around for many years to come. So don't panic. Someone has to fill the Bush-comedy void.

If you haven't seen her resignation speech, here it is [note how she uses the royal 'we']:

So there you have it. She's resigning the governorship of Alaska in order to pursue a career in the WNBA.

The line from this speech that stood out for me was, "The world needs more Trigs, not fewer."


Look, I'm not hating on the mentally challenged--that's a group of people with their own problems and unique challenges to overcome. But, as a gay man, or the mother of a gay man (ahem,) I'd never stand before a crowd of people and say, "The world needs more Perez Hiltons, not fewer."

And anyway, out of all the labyrinthine sentences in Palin's resignation speech, it was the only sentence that seemed to express genuine emotion. "The world needs more Trigs, not fewer."
Sure, the sentence implied most parents of "normal" children should trade their issue in for a Trig clone, but it was an honest, motherly thing to say. Good for Sarah.

Piper right now may be huffing paint in order to make herself more like Trig. Track, in Iraq, is probably jumping in front of a bullet right now, hoping it hits him in the head and rips out half his brain. Soon, Sarah Palin will be the Angelina Jolie of special needs children.

What kills me about Sarah Palin is that she's so impossibly cruel to her children. She's like Joe Jackson, in a way; she clearly loves her children, but she's more in love with the advantages those children bring her.

During the glorious campaign of last year, she mentioned her children in almost every speech, and often brought those children up onto stage with her. Sure, Obama did the same thing. Most politicians do. But few politicians make their children as indistinguishable from their politics as Sarah Palin. Obama might've promised his kids a puppy, but Sarah Palin? To her, Track, Bristol, Willow (the forgotten Palin!), Piper and little Trig aren't children; they're her credentials as a politician. They're planks in a right-wing political platform proving her dedication to anti-choice, pro-abstinence, religious-based upbringing.

I don't recall Reagan evoking his children when justifying most of his political experience. Reagan kinda wanted his kids to go away.

But today, no doubt pissed off because yet another beloved black man has been stealing her media attention, Sarah Palin announced she was resigning. It's almost like she hoped to upstage even Independence Day. She stood at the edge of a lake, a plane behind her (hence my Nixon reference), and delivered an incoherent speech full of bad basketball analogies, references to her kids, and poorly-chosen phrases. Again and again she said this: "It's not politics as usual," which of course it isn't. It's "politics unusual."

Nate Silver, a few hours before Sarah announced she was "not retreating, but advancing in another direction," posted a speculative piece about why liberals dislike Sarah Palin. He said the reason liberals dislike her is because "she embodies a sort of comfort with ignorance that they [liberals] think characterizes most/all conservatives." Nate was quoting from someone else there, but he goes on to say this:

If liberals are right that Palin really is ignorant, and moreover, completely comfortable with that ignorance, and moreover still, thought she ought to be Vice President of the United States, they have perhaps ample reason to dislike her. On the other hand, if they dismiss Palin because she looks pretty or talks funny or doesn't read the same newspapers they do, that goes to their being snobs.

Fine. But I also think Nate's leaving out the best part: even most conservatives hate her, because she talks funny and says dumb things. No offense to Trig, but with medical science and stem-cell research, there might be a lot fewer voters for Sarah in the futute.


Matt Osborne said...

Palin doesn't scare me. Her devoted fan base scares the hell out of me, though. Everything I detest in Sarah is what they like: her know-nothing Manichean world-view, her politics of personality, and her charismatic fringe Christianity are pluses for people who get their "news" from Pat Robertson and/or talk radio.

MM said...

She doesn't scare me. She did once, frankly, but that was nearly a year ago and I quickly came to my senses. The amusing thing to me is that I think McCain's made it is mission to destroy this woman--he's been virtually silent on the subject of Sarah Palin since the campaign.

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