Inappropriate sharing, incomprehensible ramblings, uncalled-for hostility: yup, it's a blog.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

The exotic food challenge

Going to a friend's apartment for dinner Saturday:


Ethan: Hey. Do you eat calves brain? brains

me: I cannot imagine why you would even ask me that.

Ethan: huh?

me: I'm sorry... I didn't realize you were serious. No, I don't. The idea of anything-brains is gross.

Ethan: oh. That's strange.

me: I don't think so. I don't know many people who have brains, let alone eat them.

Ethan: I grew up eating it.

me: Is this an AHS thing?

Ethan: no. It's a jewsih thing.

 me: Hm. I'm cowed by the very idea.

Ethan: bahhh...bad pun.

me: It was moo-tivated by disgust.

me: I'm utterly grossed out by the idea.

Ethan: that's strange.

me: *Udderly, I should say. I appreciate you dugs it, I suppose.

Ethan: ...

 me: Well, diet is a grey matter. There's no acownting for taste. I'm moogling recipes tho, to see if there's something too it.

Ethan: ...

me: I cortex you the best recipes, if you like.

Ethan: I spinal cord you to stop being lame :-P

me: I'm not being lame. I'm being amoosing.

me: Googling seems to discount the idea that this is a common food. At least among the goy. Interesting. Oh god, people eat the tongue a lot.

Ethan: Of course. You don't eat tongue?

me: Jesus, I've got to just go vegetarian.

Ethan: You seriously didn't know that people eat tongue?

me: I'd actually forgotten. And was happy to have forgotten.

Ethan: why? it's delicious.

me: I like my meat depersonalized (deanimalphied?) and inscrutable. If it resembles a body part, or has the words brains, testicles, hoof, or snout in it, I don't want it.

Ethan: Tongue doesn't look like tongue.

me: I can't even eat pork butt.

Ethan: I don't eat pork.

me: Of course not. Tho it is, I understand, possible to eat kosher pork.

Ethan: only if its not from pig.

me: I thought it was all in the way it's prepared.

Ethan: the way it's prepared in the sense that it's prepared from pig

me: Oh, I thought it had to be blessed or something. It's odd you can eat the brain of an animal, but god forbid you touch shellfish or swine.

Ethan: not really. Brain is only strange for you becuase you never ate it.

me: No. As I said, I googled. It's strange in general.

Ethan: No it isn't.

me: Well. I suppose cooking up Waf and serving him with some haggis wouldn't be unusual somewhere.

Ethan: Ooh, Haggis is delic.

me: I know actual Scots who find it repellant. Still, I always want to try it each Burns Day. (Which, as far as I can tell, is the Scottish attempt to have a Bloomsday)

Ethan: When i was in scotland with some friends, i had haggis, and one of my companions had vegetarian haggis it was sooo lame. if you're going to havfe haggis, you go all the fucken way.

me: Yes. Of course.

me: Tho I'm now reconsidering dinner with you guys. If you're gonna serve calf brains, then serve a lot of aperitifs first.

Ethan: Actually, i think we're serving lamb brains. The recipe calls fro one calf brain or two lamb brains

 me: Brain't saying I wouldn't try it, but pretty sure I'd gag a bit just at the idea. It's all in the head, I realize.

Ethan: ... aight, i'm sleepy bed time now. ttyl.

 me: Sheep well. So, should we bring anything for dinner Saturday? Ipecac? A stomach pump? Iocaine powder?

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